Stop shrouding sex education in shame
My sophomore year at an all-girls high school was memorable for many reasons, with my sex education class placing pretty high on the list.
At the start of each session, we would recite a manifesto entitled “I Am A Responsible Girl”, which grew increasingly disturbing and dehumanizing with each passage. Activities that would take place after ranged from week-long challenges that involved tying an egg to one’s wrist and keeping it from breaking, and pointless debates automatically skewed against contraceptives and abortion. Instead of being instrumental to our holistic growth as young women, the subject used a combination of scare tactics and Scriptures to reinforce that sex is and will always be taboo.
Such has been the case for several other Filipinos my age—a fact that leaves us feeling disappointed but not surprised. Thankfully, in modern times, TikTok presents this generation with opportunities to learn all about it outside the restricting walls of the traditional classroom. Now, teens and young adults can now watch doctors and dominatrixes alike discuss everything from basic anatomy to the female pleasure gap in three minutes or less. It’s a revolutionary move that paves the way for more progressive discussions, sure. But since the internet remains fraught with misinformation and prone to misinterpretation, kids could end up even more confused than they were before they opened the app.
Is there a middle ground, any better solution, especially in a country like ours that is steeped in conservatism and controlled by the Church? The Department of Education would argue that there is. Since the passage of the Reproductive Heath Law two administrations ago, DepEd has been hard at work to implement a comprehensive curriculum as well as community-wide health interventions that aim to teach today’s youngins about sex, sexuality, and everything that falls in between.
Rather than associating it with shame, sex should be seen as a natural and healthy part of life that almost everyone goes through; a product of love that brings in new life.
But pushback from the clergy has remained constant over the years, as they claim sensitive matters are meant to be discussed in the home, not where professors and fellow students are free to pry on such private matters. (Honestly, it’s not even that bad.) Their influence has remained strong enough over the issue, while our teenage pregnancy rates continue to rise and remain the highest in all of Asia. Though it may seem impractical to prioritize a complete system overhaul when we have a pandemic and proclamation rallies taking up our time, we should at the very least be entertaining discussions of what progressive sex education should look like.
Aside from meeting UNESCO’s “scientifically-accurate, culturally and age-appropriate, gender-sensitive, and life-skills based” standard, the topic should be tackled in a sex-positive manner. Rather than associating it with shame, sex should be seen as a natural and healthy part of life that almost everyone goes through; a product of love that brings in new life! That means no euphemisms, no malicious references, and as much as possible, no dirty jokes when we’re discussing it in a serious manner—even when kids are involved.
“These days, when we talk to children about sex, we make it about the birds and the bees,” obstetrician-gynecologist Dr. Christopher Soriano shared in a webinar held by Ateneo de Manila University’s Health Sciences Society last February 5th.
“We don’t talk about it scientifically or objectively even though we need to introduce the concepts of gender and sexuality to even younger kids.” It’s a controversial take: parents might not exactly be pleased by their kids’ innocence involuntarily being stripped away. But, take away the stigma surrounding these terms, and what do you have? Anatomically correct and age-appropriate language that promotes positive body image and even discourages potential abusers.
Jesus would frown upon such attitudes. But maybe, just maybe, He wouldn’t want to see anyone suffering in a situation that could have been avoided if only they knew what to do.
Sex educators can also afford to meet their audience where they are and make use of the digital tools at our disposal to craft information campaigns. Whether it’s catchy dances paired with infectious lyrics or serious drill-downs of related issues, any content that aims to disprove or persuade should be easily replicated in our real-life scenarios. Parents and guardians may benefit from resources like this as well, being primary role models who are expected to embody positive attitudes regarding sexual health. A lot of them might not be close-minded, like what we often believe. They probably lack the proper knowledge or the necessary conditions to have serious, open-minded conversations.
In our predominantly Catholic country, getting these ideas across is tantamount to a death sentence. One minute in, and we’d be pelted with complaints about how these encourage lewdness and recklessness in today’s teens.
As always, it helps to have a ready response: sure, Jesus would frown upon such attitudes. But maybe, just maybe, He wouldn’t want to see anyone suffering in a situation that could have been avoided if only they knew what to do.