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Ghosts in the gallery

By ANDREA BERNARDO Published Aug 16, 2024 5:00 am

Ever scrolled through your phone and stumbled upon an old flame's text, a Facebook memory with a dead friend, or a playlist from a past romance? In the digital world, memories of lost loves are just a click away, leaving us to wonder: when it's over, do we hit delete or let those digital ghosts linger?

There’s this one photo I’ve long archived on Instagram. It's of an old friend and I, our heads thrown back in laughter under the dying light of a sunset. It now serves as a bittersweet reminder of a friendship that faded as silently as that twilight.

Sunset fades, memories remain.

Instagram’s archive feature lets us hide certain posts from our profiles without completely deleting them. Memories are preserved but paused in this liminal space. Why do I hold on to them, even when some bring back painful memories? Is it a reluctance to move on, or am I a sentimental soul, a historian of my own life, curating an archive of past emotions? 

When love ends, what becomes of the photos and posts that once celebrated it?

I opine that these memories are more than mere pixels on a screen. They are remnants of things that once were; a bittersweet mix of our personal history, proof that we have lived, loved, and lost. I look at these souvenirs of grief and joy, of nostalgia, regret, and growth, and I grapple with the contradictions these memories evoke—the joy of cherished times and the ache of loss that follows.

But when is the right time to let go of our archives? When love ends, what becomes of the photos and posts that once celebrated it? Do we erase them or keep them as a testament to a chapter that, for better or worse, shaped who we are?

Images of cherished moments past.

I'm reminded of how poets would write about the impermanence of love; how they would posture love as a shadow, coming and going with the shifting light. In our digital age, this metaphor has gained a new dimension. Our online memories are the shadows, reminding us that although relationships and experiences may end, the growth they spur in us remains.

Yet it's essential to recognize that we also hold the agency to erase these memories from our minds and social media profiles. We are not merely passive recipients of our memories, but active curators. Deciding to let go of certain memories is not an act of denial but a conscious decision to prioritize our well-being. It's understanding that some memories serve no constructive purpose in our narrative but instead hold us back, shrouded in pain or regret.

This conscious act of letting go can be as empowering as remembering.